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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28148388">Love Letters</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/black_cat_curse/pseuds/black_cat_curse'>black_cat_curse</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Badass Mai (Avatar), Badass Zuko (Avatar), Cross-Posted on Wattpad, F/M, Let Toph Say Fuck, Mai joins the Gaang - Freeform, Maiko is endgame - Freeform, Slow To Update, Zuko Joins The Gaang Early (Avatar), nsfw but later - Freeform, you should probably read it there</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:40:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,901</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28148388</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/black_cat_curse/pseuds/black_cat_curse</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What would happen if Mai had joined Zuko in joining the Avatar. I love Mai and Zuko both as their own characters and as a couple. This is what I imagine would happen if they had started their relationship earlier and during Zuko's exile had sent each other secret love letters.</p><p>this can also be read on wattpad<br/>https://www.wattpad.com/story/247924994-maiko-fanfic-love-letters<br/>this is my first fanfic I need some encouragement or else I probably won't update</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Mai/Zuko (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>31</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. the original prompt/outline??? (incomplete)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>the only reason I added this is because it was previously written in two different posts days apart from one another that I posted on tumblr months ago and it was getting hard to find and harder to update without knowing a refresher for goes next, and I've been telling myself I'd finish the outline for months now and i just kept forgetting about it. hopefully this improves my motivation.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>this has probably been done before but frankly not enough. throughout their childhood Mai and Zuko would have small moments with each other and by the time they turned 12 and 13 they were having brief make out sessions whenever Azula wasn't around and they were have servants send letters to one another on secret by paying them off (like the two servants are brothers and one works at the palace and the other works for Mai's family). after the agni kai the palace servant decided to go with zuko because he felt bad for him and he was always nice to him, and with that they kept up the secret love letters but the letters got a lot longer. Mai would stash hers under her mattress and zuko would hide his in a box filled with trinkets they've shared over the years that she gave to him to remember her by. after the siege of the north communications were cut off but zuko saved his box, when Mai stopped receiving letters she began to worry then when her parents announced that they'd be moving to omashu she held onto the hope that she'd be able to find him in the earth kingdom. mai knew all about him being the blue spirit so when she heard he was in the earth kingdom she started tracking where he might be. when she was recruited by azula she didn't think much of what her job might entail, and when she found out she had a major decision to make. runaway with zuko, or betray the love of her life. the choice was made before she even knew there was one. at this point mai didn't care about the war at all, to her it was all pointless. and to zuko the war itself no longer mattered to him it was approval he was looking for some of which he got from mai and his uncle and the rest he needed to grow to understand was not what he really needed. once they were both in ba sing se it didn't take too long for their paths to cross again. this was the moment mai was waiting for she was going to find him on her own and they were going to run away together. sadly plans don't always go how you want them too, and while they were both still together, going back to the fire nation put a strain on their relationship worse than being hundreds of miles apart. when zuko left on the day of the black sun, mai didn't cry, she wasn't afraid because she knew they'd meet again. she burned the evidence and feigned heartbreak and lo and behold came the letter from her uncle, the warden. she packed everything she'd need for camping, a change of clothes, every single weapon she owned (mostly throwing knives but a few swords and Sai), her letters, and a sleeping pack. she couldn't hide the information from azula in time but she put the bag in the airship the night before leaving. she unlike zuko didn't leave a letter, she had nothing to say to them. the moment zuko walked in and the guard left she kissed him. they stayed like that for a few minutes before they exchanged explanations, zuko reluctantly agreed to let her come with the gaang though whether or not she'd be accepted amongst the group was completely up to them. when the guard came again they knew it was time to leave. they ran out together and took the warden captive with sokka and suki everyone was apprehensive around mai but that worked out in their favour. As everyone got on board the gondola and it started moving, mai stayed until they made it clear when azula and ty lee started heading towards the gondola mai ran with them and got in their way as she made it on board as soon as she secured the guards so that they wouldn't stop the gondola. once she made it on board she cut the cord azula was on causing her to leap to the other cord with her hands so she couldn't firebend and got ty lee so off balance in a mixture of shock and imbalance she ended up dangling from the cord as well. by the time they both got to safety they were already halfway to the airship. once they got onboard proper introductions were made and more explanations were given. and once they got back to the campsite that's when the questions started stumbling out. We left off with Mai deciding to risk her life in betraying the fire nation and joining Zuko in his crusade with team Avatar to stop the fire nation war. she's questioned a little once in the airship and as soon as they return to the air temple Mai is simply disregarded in the commotion. She and Zuko sneak off to his room to have a serious conversation about the state of their relationship and to bring her up to date on the plans. As that is happening Sokka is giving an animated retelling of the happenings at the boiling rock. Once Katara realizes who else is there she instantly marches into Zuko's room only to find them quite graphically making out on the floor. before she can even register what's going on she makes a face of disgust and expresses that feeling verbally as well with a surprised "ugh!". Zuko and Mai turn away from each other Zuko looking a lot more embarrassed than Mai, they get up quickly and dust themselves off. Katara demands an explanation to which they happily supply and have Sokka vouch for Mai. once that's taken care off the others are still weary about having Mai there so they decide to have her sleep in the same room as Toph so they know if she does anything suspicious. From that moment on if Zuko isn't teaching Aang and if Mai wasn't sparring with various gAang members, they were making out in the common areas, in the forrest, and even in Mai and Toph's room. In fact they were making out the moment they're blissful bubble was burst. Azula was here. They quickly sort out a plan Zuko talks to Azula, while Mai makes sure everyone gets away safely. Once everyone gets away safely Mai goes back to where Zuko is running after Azula. She joins in the fight and uses her knives to not only latch on to the surrounding airships but as a way to slice and deflate them so they don't follow you once you escape. When Zuko falls off one of the airships Appa couldn't get to him in time because he keeps having to dodge the airships so you do a running jump into a dive and use your momentum and catch Zuko and land on Appa together. While running away Mai and zuko didn't have enough time to get their packs but thankfully Toph brought Mai's with her and Sokka brought Zuko's with him. Once at the new camp ground Zuko starts setting up the tents with Mai. "do you think they'd let me sleep in your tent now?" she asks "maybe... I don't know" Zuko replies as Sokka, dramatically starts walking towards them lugging Zuko's bag behind him. "here Zuko *plops bag* hope you don't mind but I took out the box that was in there it kept poking against my back *rubs back*". Zuko's eye bugs "the wooden box?! Where'd you put it?!" Zuko asks frantically. Sokka noticing this shift calms him down and hands him the box "what's so special about it?" Sokka asks while Mai looks over and gasps as she sees all the letters she wrote to him. "you really are a dork, aren't you Zuko." Mai says kneeling next to him and taking her own letters out to show him. Zuko brings her in close and for a second it looks like they're about to cry. Sokka begins to see how romantic they're being and is now curious beyond belief. "I think there's a story here what happened? what are all those letters? who are they from? lets go to to the fire so you can tell everybody!" Sokka suggests. Mai and Zuko give each other the look and begrudgingly agree. Sokka, now excited goes bouncing to Aang and Suki to tell them about the story their about to hear. The couple exchanges one last passionate kiss only to be interrupted again this time by Toph's notable "ugh, we are definitely not sleeping in the same tent again if I have to experience more of this!". Zuko gives a soft chuckle before they get up hold hands and suggest Toph comes with them to hear the story. Toph agrees and goes to bring Katara along so they're all gathered around the camp fire together. By the end of the story everybody's crying and has grown a deeper understanding of their relationship. they even pass around a few of the less personal letters. they spend a little bit more time around the campfire telling stories, sharing jokes and figuring out plans, after a couple of hours everybody starts getting ready for bed and Mai puts her belongings in Zuko's tent. As she's organizing her things Zuko comes up behind her a starts kissing her. "your friends are nice, much more interesting than the people in the caldera." Mai says. "Yeah, but they can be kinda annoying" Zuko replies. "Katara still hates us" Mai points out, it's at that point Zuko stops kissing and huffs in frustration. "I still don't know what to do" he said stressed "well has she said anything at all about why she might not like you" "I don't know I think she just hates me because I still represent the fire nation in her eyes" "what else?" Mai pushes "she mentioned her mother a few times but I don't exactly what happened" he replies "maybe Sokka will know" she encourages "YOU'RE RIGHT" Zuko gasps "I'll go ask him now". and then Zuko and Katara go on their life changing field trip and while their gone Mai and Sokka start sparring together and Mai reveals she was trained by Piandao as well as Zuko when they were around 9-10. Mai helps Sokka with his stances and swordmanship and teaches him a few moves. and then its mostly canon from here on out, I'll probably update this but technically this is just the outline</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Prologue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I don't own these characters Blah Blah Blah</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Pov: Mai</p><p>9 yrs old</p><p>I'm hanging out with Ty Lee and Azula in the royal garden, and while being here is a good way to be entertained I can't bring myself to play like Ty Lee and Azula pushing her down reminds me why. I didn't really want to be friends with Azula because she's really scary, but once my mother heard that the princess had taken interest in me I was practically forced to hang out with her. But hanging out with Azula does have some upsides. As I see Zuko walking along the path with his mother, once we make eye contact I can't help but blush. I know it's dangerous to be like this in front of my friends, they'll tease me about this endlessly and I just know they'd do something crazy. Knowing that I'm still a little stunned at what they planned. Zuko comes over, to start playing a game and Ty Lee makes me get up. When I see Azula get the apple I'm a little confused, and I'm even more stunned when she puts the apple on my head and LIGHTS IT ON FIRE. I can't move for a second and the next zuko is pushing me into the fountain.</p><p>"Haha see I told you it would work" I hear Azula laugh</p><p>"They're so cute together" Ty Lee says</p><p>" You two are such... UGH!" I said I couldn't bring myself to finish that statement.</p><p>By that time Zuko was already stomping away and working really hard to not let out how angry I am.</p><p>"Oh relax Mai, you can go clean up inside" Azula said</p><p>"Okay" I say with a slight edge in my tone</p><p>As I'm walking inside I see Zuko's mom again and she sees me.</p><p>"Oh darling what happened, first Zuko and now you. Did you both fall in the fountain?" she asks.</p><p>"Kinda, Azula wanted to get us together so she pulled a prank on us. Is there anywhere I can clean myself up?" I say.</p><p>"Of course dear, wouldn't want you to get a cold now would we?" she says as she guides me inside.</p><p>She leads me to the nearest spare bathroom and leaves to give me some added privacy. As soon as the door closes I turn around and see Zuko cleaning himself off. Once he sees me he gets defensive.</p><p>"What are you doing here? Did Azula put you up to this to start spreading rumours?" he says getting angrier.</p><p>I don't know how to react so I quickly compose myself and think of an appropriate answer.</p><p>"I'm sorry Zuko, I didn't know that you were in here and I didn't know what Azula was going to do. Trust me I was just as shocked as you were. Thanks for putting the fire out, I was so stunned I could barely move" the entire time I'm trying hard not to blush and to conceal my face from him. He walks towards me and says "Azula is so mean I don't knowwhy you hang out with her, you seem so cool". At this point I can't hide it anymore and I see Zuko blushing a little too, he looks flustered "Y-you look pretty when you blush N-not that you're not pretty when you aren't blushing but umm... yeah, you're really pretty." he continues and I feel my heart flutter. "T-thanks Zuko I think you look pretty too I MEAN handsome, I mean uhh yeah, I think you're handsome". At this point we're both acting weird and I feel relieved when Zuko suggests finally getting cleaned up together. We keep on staring at each other as we're cleaning up and we can't help but giggle. As I'm about to leave Zuko asks to walk me out.</p><p>"Uhh can I walk you to the door?"</p><p>"Okay" I reply</p><p>As we're walking we talk</p><p>"Do you think that we could maybe hang out sometimes, I'd really like spending time with you" he asks</p><p>"Sure, but I don't want Azula finding out she'd probably try to hurt both of us" I warn</p><p>"Maybe we can meet up after you play with Azula, tell her your parents need you home early or tell your parents you're staying over later and then we can meet up at the turtle duck pond or maybe my room" he suggested</p><p>"I like that, we can try it out on Friday I'm supposed to hangout with Azula after school, I'll tell my parents I want an extra 30 minutes and promise to do all my homework"</p><p>"Cool -"</p><p>"Prince Zuko lady Ursa requests your presence in living room" a guard says</p><p>"Of course, umm bye Mai see you Friday" he said walking away</p><p>"Bye Zuko"</p><p>I didn't meet up with Zuko after playing with Azula on Friday, I didn't even walk with Azula that day. That was the day Azulon died, Zuko's mother went missing, and the day the nation found out Lu Ten had died and Iroh wasn't returning for a while. The entire time I couldn't help worrying how Zuko must be doing, I know Azula and the new Firelord Ozai wouldn't care about how he feels which makes it all the more important that I do. So that night I dressed in my darkest clothes and snuck into the palace. I made sure to go to the guards that I knew because it's futile trying to sneak in undetected, and If I couldn't get inside I wrote a letter beforehand just so that he knows I'm there for him. In the letter I included a poem that I think he'd like it goes; </p><p>Dear Zuko,</p><p>Some griefs (and you know yours by name)</p><p>twist so terribly deep that instead of crying</p><p>you carry them like inoperable bullets inside your flesh</p><p>and feel their twinges every few seconds without</p><p>letting on to even your dearest--</p><p>damnable, beautiful griefs that fit you like a bone.</p><p>~Mai</p><p>I went to the guard named Xiu and told him I wanted to make sure prince Zuko was doing okay and maybe talk to him. He said no but that if it wasn't against the rules he would totally let me go inside. Then he told me to go back home or else he'll have his brother tell my parents. Xiu was a soldier under general Iroh and was given the job by Iroh when he decided to move back to the caldera to take care of his family and kids. Xiu's brother, Aimashi has been working for my parents since I was a baby. Before I went back home I made Xiu promise to give the letter to Zuko. Once that was done I snuck back into my room and off to bed.</p><p>The next day Zuko came over to my house a little after breakfast time, he looked so sad so I gave him a quick hug before we started talking. Azula wasn't with him, which was odd, but a lot of weird things have been happening. I brought Zuko with me to the backyard so we could talk privately.</p><p>"I got your letter Mai, it was really sweet. Thank you"</p><p>"I just want you to know that I'm here for you if you need me. All you have to do is ask"</p><p>"I'd like that." Zuko replied</p><p>"Do you want to talk about it"I ask</p><p>"Actually, right know I want to talk about anything but that" he said</p><p>I didn't know what to say or what to talk about so I just thought of the most interesting thing I do</p><p>"Okay... well can I show you something I've been working on?" I ask</p><p>"Sure, what is it?"</p><p>"Well" I say nervously as I take out the knives my uncle gave me for my birthday</p><p>"I've been teaching myself how to throw knives... I haven't showed anybody yet not even my parents they'd freak out if they knew"</p><p>"It's okay I won't tell, I think that's super cool. How many knives do you have? Where'd you get them? How long have you been practising?" He asks more questions the more excited he gets and he gets excited with each new question.</p><p>"Well my uncle gave me 3 on my birthday and I've been practicing on this tree ever since" I respond while showing him the marks on the tree with a small paper target on it. </p><p>"Oh cool, can I see you throwing them?" he pleads</p><p>"Yeah" I say while walking further away and getting into position.</p><p>THUMP THUMP THUMP</p><p>All three knives converge at one point on the bullseye.</p><p>"Wow Mai you're really good, and you don't even have a master yet" he questions</p><p>"Yeah I just do it when I'm by myself." I say shyly</p><p>"You should show your parents, maybe if they see how good you are they'd let you find a master and think how good you'd be then" he encourages</p><p>"I don't know do you really think so"</p><p>"I absolutely know so"</p><p>"Okay I'll ask them soon"</p><p>We hadn't even realized how close we were at this point, we were just grazing each other and then we started to stare at one another and I felt my heart beating in my ears.</p><p>We start leaning in closer when Zuko abruptly pulls back and says "oh umm I wrote a letter for you too, I know I'm already here in person but please accept this and read it when no one is watching."</p><p>"O-okay" my mouth goes dry for a second. And the sun is starting to set</p><p>"Umm well, I-I guess I'll see you later Mai Bye" he says while walking to the front of the house.</p><p>"Bye Zuko"</p><p>As soon as he's out of eyeshot I dash to my room and read the letter it read;</p><p>Dear Mai,</p><p>When I am closed</p><p>Used up</p><p>You are stretched at your fullest width</p><p>Ready to give</p><p>I want to jump</p><p>Into you</p><p>And feel this life</p><p>As you do</p><p>Perhaps then</p><p>I could give as you do</p><p>Perhaps then</p><p>I could live as you do</p><p>Thank you, I hope one day we wouldn't have to hide or be afraid about what the people closest to use might do if they were to find out we're friends. In all honesty I don't just want to be your friend Mai, you're so beautiful I don't want to share your time with my sister. I want to be with you all day because you are now one of the only people who make me feel safe, who make me feel heard, who listens to me. For now we'll be friends but I promise you one day we'll be together, and you won't have to answer to anybody. Not Azula, not your parents and certainly never me.</p><p>With love</p><p>~ Zuko</p><p>It took all mai had in her not to cry, so instead she wrote a letter.</p><p>Dear Zuko,</p><p>The minute our eyes met</p><p>it was love at first sight</p><p>I knew you were the perfect one for me</p><p>Our families tried to keep us apart</p><p>but I simply couldn't let you go</p><p>The moment our eyes met I thought I was dreaming, or maybe drowning in a sea of sunlight. But I knew your eyes were different. Within your iris held most people don't carry, a love most people don't feel. You knew what it was to love and to care, you're so filled with emotion. It's sad to know that most people wouldn't nurture that emotion but instead squash it down until it was nothing but anger. But like you I am not like most people, when I see your eyes light up there is almost nothing I wouldn't do to see them light up again. The mere presence of your happiness ignites a feeling in me I thought had died. Love.</p><p>Sincerely,</p><p>~Mai</p><p>I quickly handed the letter off to Aimashi along with one silver piece and begged that he have his brother deliver this message to Zuko for me. He agreed and told me to keep my money, but I insisted he take it for I would be delivering and receiving many more secret letters. And so began our blissful love affair............</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Pov : Zuko</p><p>13 yrs old</p><p>"I don't know I just feel like I'm ready to take on more responsibility, if I wanna be a good Fire Lord one day I have to start learning about what I want to tackle and get done so that I don't just waste forever planning and be like one of those old geysers in court." I let out.</p><p>"If you feel like you're ready to be a part of the meetings you need to assert yourself and get yourself a seat at the table instead of waiting for them to ask you." Mai responds</p><p>"Do you really think it'll work?" I question</p><p>"No way to know unless you do it. Just don't mess it up, the first few times you need to be purely observational. Then once your attendance is considered regular you can add in information, or correct some people to the point of recognition but without disrespect. You want to build your way up and gain the respect of the elders so they don't start bad mouthing your legitimacy and work ethics."</p><p>"Thanks Mai, you're the best. I don't know what I did to deserve you" I respond while pulling her closer to me</p><p>"I don't know what you did to deserve me either but you could start by getting me a fruit tart and well see where we go from there."</p><p>Today is such a beautiful day for a picnic, and there are no distractions where we are just me, Mai and the sunset. As I give her the fruit tart my eyes can't help but dart to her lips wondering what she must taste like right now. Deciding it's worth a shot I lean in for a kiss only to be met with even more intensity than intended. Agni I love this girl.</p><p>"Okay, I'm going to do it, the next meeting's in 30 minutes I need to get ready." I say while pulling away from our intense kiss.</p><p>"Are you sure we can't stay for a few more minutes?" Mai tries to persuade by tugging me down to her lips.</p><p>"Sorry fire lily but I wanna make a good first impression" I say, giving her a few last pecks before making my way up and out of our picnic spot.</p><p>"I promise I'll make it up to you. BYE LOVE YOU" I say getting even further away</p><p>"Love you too dork" I hear her mumble as I walk with a smirk on my face.</p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;</p><p>"Well this wasn't supposed to happen" Mai says plopping down on my bed while I start getting ready to train after explaining what happened.</p><p>"It's okay Mai, I'm just going to be fighting some old guy. I won't even break a sweat." I say trying to calm Mai's nerves.</p><p>"It's just... I have a bad feeling about this Zuko. I don't want anything bad to happen to you" she replies showing some of her fear on her face.</p><p>I go over to give her a kiss and assure her that I can handle this.</p><p>"I'll be alright Mai, I promise."</p><p>"I'll hold you to that" she says holding onto my arms</p><p>Now comes the worse news "Mai I don't want you to come see me fight... I love you and I don't want you to see that part of me"</p><p>"It's okay. To be honest I don't really want to go. I don't agree with why you were challenged. You were doing what you felt was right and standing up for the people of the Fire Nation. You're more noble than all those noblemen combined. You'll be a great Fire Lord some day. I love you, Zuko"</p><p>And we sealed that moment with a kiss...</p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;</p><p>I'm in the medical wing with Iroh and we only have until tomorrow at sunset before we must leave. I can't help thinking about Mai and I'm glad she wasn't there to see the fight, but no doubt Azula will tell her all about it in gruesome detail just to see her suffer. I make the decision to do something I haven't done in a long time.</p><p>"Uncle could you please get me some things from my room. There are some things I just can't leave behind."</p><p>"Of course Zuko, what do you want me to get"</p><p>"On my desk there's a letter writing station in a wooden box, I need you to make sure it's stocked with all writing materials and extra paper. Also in my closet on the floor behind the shoes there's a more ornate box, don't open it, it's extremely personal. And lastly In my nightstand drawer there's a gift box, don't open that either."</p><p>"Of course Prince Zuko"</p><p>"Thank you uncle."</p><p>As he leaves the reality of what's about to happen sets in and I'm fighting back tears. Before I leave I need to ask for a messenger hawk or something. The idea of never hearing from Mai again nearly kills me. I know I need to find the Avatar, I'm now more determined than ever.</p><p>Iroh comes back in with the supplies I was asking for with Xiu helping to carry them. As soon as they set it down I start grabbing for the letter writing station and I ask Xiu</p><p>"Xiu does your brother still work at the Ukano household?"</p><p>"Yes he does"</p><p>"Good do you mind sending one more letter on my behalf? There are some loose ends I need to tie up."</p><p>"It would be my honour, Prince Zuko" he responds</p><p>I start writing and don't stop until I'm done I don't even realize the tears on the page. Xiu takes the page and I hand him the gift to give to her as fast as possible while Uncle stays to comfort me.</p><p>Remember me when I am gone away,</p><p>Gone far away into the silent land;</p><p>When you can no more hold me by the hand,</p><p>Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.</p><p>Remember me when no more day by day</p><p>You tell me of our future that you plann'd:</p><p>Only remember me; you understand</p><p>It will be late to counsel then or pray.</p><p>Yet if you should forget me for a while</p><p>And afterwards remember, do not grieve:</p><p>For if the darkness and corruption leave</p><p>A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,</p><p>Better by far you should forget and smile</p><p>Than that you should remember and be sad.</p><p>Dear Fire lily,</p><p>The fight I thought was with my original challenger turned out to be a fight between my father and I. I couldn't fight him, and therefore forfeited the fight. I'm sorry Mai. I'm sorry I'm leaving, I wish I could be with you and give you one last kiss. I don't know if I'll ever be back. The only way I'd be allowed back into the Fire nation once I leave is if I catch the avatar. I'll do everything in my power to come back to you. I don't care about nobility, or honour if you aren't there with me.</p><p>Your beloved</p><p>~Zuko</p><p>Pov : Xiu</p><p>Seeing Zuko writing his goodbye I can't help but sympathize. He didn't do anything wrong and he doesn't deserve to be treated like this. Aimashi and I have seen their love, and they're nothing but kind to us. I get the letter and the gift to my brother as fast as possible trying to find where he'd be at this hour. I got to the back of the Ukano house where he and some others are tending to the garden.</p><p>"Aimashi! I need your help with something brother!"</p><p>"Xiu, what is it?"</p><p>I guide him over away from the people and hand him the letter and gift while telling him.</p><p>"The Prince Zuko has been sent to exile by his Father for speaking out against a military strategy that would've knowingly used new recruits as bait. He sends one last letter to Lady Mai as a farewell. I have an idea, Aimashi, should I join the prince in exile and aid him so that we could correspond letters between Lady Mai and Prince Zuko. They are just children in love and they don't deserve to be treated so poorly for doing nothing but loving each other."</p><p>"You're thinking about Yu Yan again aren't you. Very well I agree with you, they've been nothing but generous to us and have helped our family save enough money to support mother and grandmother. Join the Prince if you can and I'll deliver this letter to Lady Mai right now so there might be a reply before nightfall"</p><p>"Thank you brother" I say with a smile on my face.</p><p>Pov : Mai</p><p>"Lady Mai?"</p><p>"How many times have I said Aimashi, just Mai is fine"</p><p>"It's okay Lady Mai, I come with a letter and package from Prince Zuko and some news for you."</p><p>That sparks my attention, Zuko and I have stopped sending each other love letters months ago. What could he possibly have done?</p><p>"Thank you Aimashi, and the news?" I ask</p><p>"I feel you should read the letter before I tell you the news" he responds</p><p>" very well" I reply</p><p>As I'm reading the letter I feel my heart breaking, taking in every detail from the wobbly strokes of the brush to the tear stains on the paper. The uncertainty of if we'll ever speak again is what kills me. I decided to save the gift to open in private knowing it will be thoughtful and perfect.</p><p>"Lady Mai, the news. My brother has decided to go along with the prince and bring with him a messenger hawk so that you may continue your correspondence with the prince. I know this news is troubling and mere letters don't replace the love you share in your physical connection but I hope this gives you something to look forward to." Aimashi says</p><p>"Thank you Aimashi, you and your brother have been our best friends and allies" I say while going to my closet. I crouch down and find the bag I'm looking for. I take it out and hand it to him. "For you and your family, may you receive the best the world has to offer."</p><p>He opens the bag and sees it's full of gold and silver coins I've saved over the past 3 years.</p><p>"Lady Mai this is too much" he says handing it back to me.</p><p>"Please" I respond "I can't think of any people more deserving. I insist you take it. I've been saving it specifically for you."</p><p>"Thank you ... Mai"</p><p>"It's my pleasure, do you mind waiting while I write a response" I say walking towards my desk with a much larger box in hand.</p><p>"I don't mind at all." he responds</p><p>love me</p><p>through it all</p><p>the beautiful days</p><p>the dark days</p><p>the days when I am drowning</p><p>the days when I am lost</p><p>the days when I am stagnant</p><p>for it is love,</p><p>and only love,</p><p>that heals all wounds</p><p>Dear Zuko,</p><p>We'll be together soon, and though our love is being tested I know we'll get through this together. I know that your time in exile though painful will be an eye opening experience. I can't help but look at all the possibilities the world has to offer you. Even if it kills me that we're apart, I want you to take the opportunity the spirits have given you and make the most of it and when it's all done we'll be together again and we'll be stronger than ever.</p><p>With love</p><p>~Mai</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter is kinda short but not really..... ENJOY!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Pov : Zuko</p><p>The next morning while packing Iroh comes in my room along with Xiu. Xiu is carrying a packed bag, a letter and a large rectangular box that could've only come from one person... Mai.</p><p>"Prince Zuko, Xiu has decided to join us on our journey." Iroh states</p><p>"I also come bearing a response and package from Lady Mai"</p><p>"Thank you Xiu, You have been a loyal companion to my uncle and I for as long as I've known you and beyond. I'm grateful for your support."</p><p>"The honour is all mine Prince Zuko. throughout this journey I will be able to give and receive letters from my brother and I hope you could take advantage of my family's messenger hawk to send correspondence to certain companions in the caldera"</p><p>"That is a most generous offer, I feel I cannot repay this debt of gratitude that you have given me in my darkest moment"</p><p>"Worry not, Prince Zuko, the Lady Mai has already repaid my family in a way my brother and I never saw coming. Your letter and package please"</p><p>"Yes yes, please give me a moment to open them in privacy"</p><p>"Of course, Prince Zuko"</p><p>Pov : 3rd person</p><p>At the same time Zuko was opening his gift Mai was opening hers they were both shocked at what they found. Zuko found dual broadswords made by Piandao, with a note that read;</p><p>In your arms you hold me tight,</p><p>Never letting go through the night.</p><p>All my dreams are peaceful because of you,</p><p>Holding me in your arms like you do.</p><p>At the sight of Mai's gift she gasped, then almost laughed, they knew each other so well it was comical. In her box Mai held throwing knives handmade by Piandao, with her own note that read;</p><p>When you're sad and depressed,</p><p>I will be here to put a smile on your face.</p><p>When you're angry and frustrated,</p><p>I will be here to calm you down.</p><p>When you're lonely and have no one,</p><p>I will be here to comfort you.</p><p>When you're feeling unloved and unwanted,</p><p>I will be here to tell you how very important you are.</p><p>When you're having a bad day and need to lash out,</p><p>I will be here to let off steam.</p><p>And though my body isn't near</p><p>My heart will always be with you</p><p>In that moment Zuko and Mai shed a single tear for the love they shared. That's future is uncertain.</p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;</p><p>It's almost sunset, Zuko and his crew are boarding the ship and packing their bags. It wasn't the ship they were expecting but they would make do with what they had for the right cause. Xiu was boarding with his messenger hawk on his arm, uncle Iroh was getting comfortable looking over the horizon Zuko was doing the same though not as relaxed as Iroh. Until Iroh heard soft pads of feet quickly moving towards them, Iroh jerked his head thinking it was an attack, Zuko seeing this turned as well only to see... Mai. She walked to Zuko slowly each step with more emotion than she's ever expressed on her face.</p><p>"Zuko I-" she starts</p><p>"It's okay Mai there's nothing any of us could've done. It's my fault" he cuts off</p><p>"Zuko, you did nothing wrong. I love you Zuko always know that" she says</p><p>"I know Mai I love you too. I'll be back, I know it" Zuko reassured</p><p>Leaning towards each other they give one last kiss before Mai leaves the ship hiding herself in the shadows while watching him depart.</p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;</p><p>Pov : Mai</p><p>For the first time I'm seriously questioning the Fire Lord, how cruel does somebody have to be where torturing and banishing your own son can be done so calmly? If this is the best of what our people have to offer how are we 'spreading our greatness'? Is this war even worth it? What are we even fighting for?</p><p>I don't know the answer to any of these questions but I know one thing for sure if anybody finds out about these thoughts my future would look awfully dead.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Pov : Mai</p><p>2 weeks later</p><p>From the moment Zuko had left every day that passed made me feel a little more depressed, compliant almost. I had no more drive to fight back my mothers constant derating, oor to defend myself from Azula's incessant humiliation. All I could do to make everything seem a little less bleak was train; throwing knives, hand to hand, stealth. It took my mind away from my heartbreak and forced me to focus on all the tiny details I'd have never noticed before.</p><p>"Mai! What could you possibly be thinking about?!" Azula yells</p><p>Schooling my face I bring my attention back to what's around me. I'm at the royal palace for a sleepover with Azula and Ty lee. Coming up with the best excuse possible I respond</p><p>"Nothing, it's just my parents have been acting even more crazy lately. I think they're worried that I might do something crazy, they won't leave me alone."</p><p>"Well off course they'd be concerned when you're acting even more depressed and stand-offish than you normally do. They're probably thinking you might try and defend Zuko to the Fire Lord and that just won't do if your parents want to remain in the royal court. I say just forget about Zuko entirely and start acting like how you used to." Azula replied</p><p>"It's okay Mai, they're just looking out for you. Your aura has been looking really dark lately, maybe we just need to do something exciting to cheer you up!" Ty lee suggested</p><p>"It's okay Ty lee I'll get over it, it's not that important anyway. I'm not going to do anything, Zuko's gone and there's nothing I can do about it anyway so why dwell on it" I say trying to brush the whole thing off.</p><p>"Ugh... Just get over it quickly I don't want to deal with an extra moody Mai" Azula says while Ty lee gives my hand a squeeze to show her support.</p><p>The rest of the night is spent giggling and chatting while Azula shows off and Ty lee praises her with me giving a few acceptable comments here and there to seem part of the conversation.</p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;</p><p>The next day I'm being ridden back home in a carriage on the way there I start thinking about Zuko. Is he okay? Was he assassinated? Why hasn't he written to me yet? Where is he? These thoughts travel with me all the way to my room. I ask for someone to be brought in to help me unpack and who should walk in but Aimashi.</p><p>"Lady Mai I have good news and bad news for you." he says</p><p>I hold my breath not knowing how to respond so choose the most honest reply I can give</p><p>"Oh?"</p><p>"Yes I have received a letter from Zuko but I have left it at my home thinking you wouldn't be back until tomorrow"</p><p>I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding</p><p>"That's no problem Aimashi, I've waited 2 weeks for a letter what's one more day" I reply relieved it wasn't a serious problem</p><p>"Of course Lady Mai, I'll have the letter to you by sunrise. A great way to start the day I'd presume?"</p><p>"That depends entirely on what he writes to me"</p><p>"I suppose so Lady Mai" he responds just as he finishes putting away my belongings</p><p>&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;&gt;</p><p>The next day I'm woken up earlier than usual by one of the house staff so I begin preparing myself for school when I see a letter on my vanity. A book looks like a better way to describe it, it's thick and looks like someone poured their heart and soul into it. I think I know why I was woken up early. Opening the letter the first page reads</p><p>Dear Firelily,</p><p>Words cannot describe how much my heart aches, being a firebender I thought the fire was my friend but now the heat feels like it's burning me from the inside out. I can't bear the thought of going on this journey without you. However, in order to be together again I won't stop searching on this impossible mission until I've succeeded. Everyday and every night I can't stop thinking about you. The possibility of coming back to the Fire Nation, back to you the only person who's ever made me feel so vulnerable and cared for, is the only thing keeping me going.</p><p>Sometimes this all seems so bleak, I've now been doomed to search the world endlessly without a clue where to look for one person. It seems all but impossible. I know that's why my father did this, I know he doesn't think anything of me, that I'm weak, but I need to prove to him that I'm not. I need to prove to the whole of the Fire Nation that I can and will be a worthy prince and future Fire Lord. I know that one day I'll be Fire Lord and when I am the first thing I'll do is make you Fire Lady.</p><p>I've been training with the dao swords you've given me. They're beautiful, two halves of one whole. So far I've been teaching myself but some of the crew members and uncle Iroh have given me some tips. Uncle even said he knows a master swordsman who might be willing to come on the ship to train me for a few days. I'm even trying to incorporate it with my Fire bending but it's getting harder and harder to control my fire. Uncle says it's because I'm still angry, that I need to properly deal with my emotions and then let go of my anger to move further with my bending. I've had a lot of time to practice though, we've already been to the western air temple, next is the eastern one, then north, then south. Once we've found some clues we'll look for rumours and such, mostly earth kingdom cities. We might stop by at the southern water tribe after the southern air temple though. The western air temple was crazy! All the buildings were upside down and there were so many statues it looked like a museum.</p><p>Writing this to you now I can't help but wonder what you're doing, how's your knife throwing? How's your mother acting? What new and profound torture has Azula been subjecting you too? I want to hear from you, I want to hear that everything is okay and that your life is going perfect but I know that doesn't happen.</p><p>The miles are long and far and wide,</p><p>But my love for you will never subside.</p><p>My heart will continue strong and true,</p><p>Steadfast in my love for you.</p><p>You never need to fret or fear;</p><p>My only love is for you my dear.</p><p>It hurts to be so far from you,</p><p>But a love like ours will make it through.</p><p>Keep holding on a little longer;</p><p>Our love will keep on growing stronger.</p><p>Love</p><p>~ Zuko</p><p>Reading the letter I feel a roller coaster of emotions, he's safe, he's getting better, he's alive. He has a lot of feelings and he can't let go, he can't deal with them, but he's got Iroh by his side and based on what he's written his uncle seems to really care about him. Attached to the letter are pages and pages of poems, some about me and some about his family, all of them express him. His fragility and his perseverance, his fear and his courage, his ruthlessness and his integrity. Everything I love about him.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>three years later and aang just came out of the iceberg. see how this affects the lives of our main characters and how they've changed in the last 3 years apart.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I OWN NOTHING<br/>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>Zuko's POV: 3 years later</p><p>Sitting down at my desk I begin thinking of what I should write to my beloved. We've just reached the south pole after running through all of our leads and each passing day my hope for ever returning dims. After three years at sea I can't help but wonder how Mai has changed. There's a part of me that wants nothing more than to run into her arms but there's another part of me that's scared. I'm scared that when she sees me she'll be disgusted or come to her senses. She doesn't deserve having to put her life on hold for me. I don't know what else to do but to tell her how I feel.</p><p>Dear Mai, </p><p>When it hurts so bad,<br/>why does it feel so good?<br/>I wish this all made sense,<br/>I wish I understood.<br/>Not having you here with me is tearing me up inside,<br/>but I can't stop thinking about you no matter how hard I try.</p><p>You know how I feel about you,<br/>and I know I want to spend the rest of my life with you,<br/>but it's so hard to do when I can't even be next to you.<br/>Why does it gotta be so complicated?</p><p>Loving you feels so right,<br/>but at the same time,<br/>knowing I can't have you keeps me awake at night.<br/>I just want this to be simple,<br/>I just want you here with me,<br/>to look into your eyes,<br/>be held in your arms...then I'd truly be happy.</p><p>Through these three long years your letters have kept me afloat whenever I feel I'm about to drown. Your love and care is something I one day wish to deserve. I can't stop this  feeling though, that I'm holding you from reaching your fullest. with each passing day I'm sailing further away with still no luck of coming home. I must capture the avatar but I no longer know how. I'm scared of not being able to ever see you again, but I'm also scared of what seeing you might mean. In these years I've changed and though I'm sure you have as well I fear I have changed for the worse. I now bear  the mark of a banished prince, a horrendous scar across my face making me unlovable. Believe that if there were chance I'd be allowed back home I'd take it but now it seems more like a fools errand. A wild armadillo-goose chase. It is my wish for you to be happy, it is my deepest desire. It is now why with great sorrow in my heart that I ask, whatever bond you have to me whatever hope you have that I'll come back. lose it. For your own good for there is no happiness in false hope and waiting. Find someone who will love you even the smallest fraction of my love for you and they will love you to the sun and back 100 times over. </p><p>Where I am now it is cold, the southern water tribe hase the harshest weather and torturous waters. Yet its beauty is something to behold, the snow shimmers in the light like crystal and the icebergs stand alone like islands of their own. The waters glimmer in Agni's light but become wrathful by Tui's night. There's a vastness looking out, that makes me feel like the only being here for miles on end but there's a familial loving warmth within the people here. Uncle says that by observing and understanding how different people lead their lives we can learn to become more well rounded people and thus better in our understanding and knowledge. Sometimes I wonder why all those people had to die. Why so many families had to have been broken. It can't have been for nothing right? </p><p>These thoughts are leading me down a treacherous path and I need your guidance. You've always helped me, you've always understood what I need, who I am. I need to know what I'm doing is right. I feel like I'm being pulled every which direction by what other people want me to do and everyone say their way is the right way is confusing me. Do I have a responsibility to my father even if what he's doing is wrong? Or should my loyalty lie with my people? Is there truth to uncle's ramblings that I need to listen to and follow? Help me make a decision Mai, you're the only one that's ever been truly honest with me.</p><p>yours forever and always </p><p>~Zuko</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>After setting my letter out to dry I head back to the deck of the ship to get some fresh air as I'm pretty frustrated with all my thoughts clearly running through my head. As I walk past Uncle my gaze becomes captivated by an incredible beacon of light. </p><p>"Finally...Uncle do you realize what this means?!"</p><p>"I won't get to finish my game?"</p><p>"It means my search is about to come to an end"</p><p>Uncle sighs</p><p>"That light came from an incredibly powerful source. It has to be him!"</p><p>"Or it's just the celestial lights, we've been down this road before prince Zuko. I don't want you to get too excited over nothing. Please sit, why don't you enjoy a cup of calming jasmine tea"</p><p>"I DON'T NEED ANY CALMING TEA! I NEED TO CAPTURE THE AVATAR! HELMSMAN! HEAD A COURSE FOR THE LIGHT" </p><p>"Prince Zuko-</p><p>"I'll be in my room uncle, I must prepare for the avatar's capture. I expect another fire bending lesson when I return"</p><p>With that I march back to my room.</p><p>As soon as I get inside my room I open my letter writing box and and take out the materials needed and write;</p><p>Dear Mai,</p><p>I believe I have found the avatar, if I am correct upon their capture I should be home in no less than a month. I might just be coming home my love.</p><p>yours,</p><p>Zuko</p><p>I roll up this letter along with the others written today and last night and place them in chronological order. Once rolled I bring it with me out of my room and start looking for Xiu to send the compiled letters to Mai.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>Mai's POV:</p><p>Walking through master Piandao's armoury I can do nothing but appreciate the level of craftsmanship this man has and wonder if I'll ever be able to master all of them. In my six months training with Piandao I've mastered: the jian, the sai, shuriken, darts, archery, the crossbow, calligraphy, the combat sickle and scythe, the spear, the longsword, the war hammer, the dual axe and the dart knife. There are more I'm still in the process of learning but being here has made me the happiest I've been in a long time. Zuko suggested asking my parents again to train in Shu Jing but this time I convinced Azula it was somewhere  should go to learn more about the blade and once the princess agrees my parents had no choice but to say yes. plus being back home is too stressful and boring. I don't have to hide my letters to and from Zuko, I'm practicing and art I love and I no longer have to stress about being the perfect daughter. Especially now that my parents have Tom-Tom their basically rubbing it in my face how much they would've preferred me be a boy fire bender and how little they care for me now that I'm no longer of use to them. </p><p>"Lady Mai, I figured I'd find you here"</p><p>"Piandao, you should know by now this is my favourite room at your estate, Thank you again for training me here and showing such hospitality."</p><p>"Any friend of Zuko and Iroh's is a friend of mine, though the amount of letters we're receiving from the young prince makes me think your friendship is much more than I initially realized. How is my old student now anyway?"</p><p>"I never tried my relationship with Zuko, especially not whilst here. As for how he's doing I should be expecting a letter from him within the next 2 or 3 days, maybe sooner if he has something he can't wait to share." I let out with a sigh</p><p>"Would it make you feel better if I told you that you're my best student so far."</p><p>At this I feel my mood spike up in my chest if only for a moment and a feeling of pride in my accomplishments. I can't wait to tell Zuko.</p><p>"Thank you Master Piandao you have been to kind to me, it is an honour to receive this praise from someone of your mastery and caliber."</p><p>"Enough with the formalities Lady Mai, I think you've earned it"</p><p>"Verywell, so long as you just call me Mai "</p><p>"What were you thinking about right before I walked in? You seemed to be in deep concentration and if it were possible even mildly surprised."</p><p>"I was just wondering if I needed to pick up a new weapon or get better at an older skill. I need a better distraction, it seems that while my parents aren't here to control me their letters are starting to make it feel like they are."</p><p>"Well we do have a Yuyan archer arriving in a few days time perhaps a crash course in archery and stealth ought to excite you. Who knows, with your skills you might even get requited."</p><p>"I don't doubt the excitement it'll have to offer but I would probably have to decline any offers for the time being. My parents do not yet know the lengths of my knowledge and training and I believe they'd prefer me being married off to some rich noble whom I know nothing about to the idea that I'd be fighting. Also you know as well as I that this war is not worth the sacrifice of life."</p><p>"I couldn't have worded it better myself Mai" Piandao says as Xiu approaches then bows</p><p>"Lady Mai, I've just received a letter from Prince Zuko. Master Piandao, Fat has a letter for you from General Iroh"</p><p>"I'd better go see what new Pai Sho strategies and tea blends Iroh has come up with. I'll leave you to your letter Mai, do inform Zuko to practice with his swords" he says whilst walking away.</p><p>"I will Piandao. Follow me Xiu to the sitting room"</p><p>It was a hassle to convince my parents to let Xiu come with me, apparently they thought we were lovers but after tracking both Xiu and mines movements for a little over a week they realized that was not the case. Thank Agni Zuko had already started sending his letters to Piandao's castle or else they would've learned of the letters and force me to end communication. Once they were convinced of no ill intentions I simply made up the excuse of Xiu being able to protect me should anything bad happen, and told them he is my most trusted male servant. That appeased them and they let him come with me. </p><p>"Of course Mai."</p><p>As we reach the sitting room and become seated Xiu hands me the roll of days worth of letters. The first 2 letters are from Aimashi for Xiu which I hand back to him and the 5 left over are from Zuko to me. Looking through the letters I start with the shortest as it was obviously written hastily and has me a bit concerned.</p><p>I believe I have found the avatar, if I am correct upon their capture I should be home in no less than a month. I might just be coming home my love.</p><p>I have found the avatar, if I am correct upon their capture I should be home in no less than a month. I might just be coming home my love.</p><p>if I am correct upon their capture I should be home in no less than a month. I might just be coming home my love.</p><p>I should be home in no less than a month. I might just be coming home my love.</p><p>I might just be coming home my love.</p><p>"He's coming home" I whisper</p><p>At this Xiu's head snaps up</p><p>"Lady Mai?"</p><p>"He might've just found the Avatar. He's going to be coming home"</p><p>At this revelation I have to actively hold back my tears but it's proving to be difficult</p><p>"Congratulations, Mai"</p><p>"I think I'll spend so time reading his letters and writing back. please tell Master Piandao that I will not be joining him for any afternoon lessons today and bring my lunch to my room when it is prepared."</p><p>"Of course, Mai"</p><p>and with that I was off.</p><p>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p><p>updates are sporadic and slow. I have no excuse for that but I will try to be better. please comment, vote and share. the more support I have the more people I would hate to disappoint so hopefully I can be guilted into doing things on time. he real problem is that I realized I'm gonna have to watch season 1 all over again because things mostly stay canon up until the episode with the train. I know what I want to write and the feelings I want to provoke but I can figure out which words to use and in what order so I end up procrastinating and then forgetting about it because the updates are done on Wattpad but I don't read on Wattpad anymore.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 5</h2></a>
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    <p>POV: Mai</p><p>After receiving the letters I read through them all whilst still in the sitting room. the things he's saying about himself aren't true and I would wait day in and day out until the end of days if it meant I could see him again. With this in mind I know what I must do. I head to my room and prepare my writing utensils; my ink, my brush, my paper and two drawings, one of me and one of Zuko. My image was drawn under a week ago and I plan to send it along with the letter. Once everything is in place I begin writing</p><p>Dear beloved, </p><p>The mere thought of giving up hope for you is worse than giving up the air in my lungs, too painful to even suggest. The thought of loosing you is more frightening than seeing the sun set but never rise again. The mention of giving up makes me so unstable it feels like there is no ground beneath me feet, just endless falling. I'd rather give up the water in my blood than ever bee without you again. Without you in my life I would have no passion because all my passion lies with you. I love you.</p><p>Even when you're halfway across the world I love you. Even when I haven't heard from you in weeks I love you, because you see me for who I truly am and you have the ability to appreciate it. You understand how deeply I feel all my emotions, how much I yearn to be free, to learn more, to explore without boundaries or purpose but to simply enjoy the moment, and you care. you care so deeply about everything you do because you love deeply everyone you are close to. You have grown as have I but I know for certain the boy with whom I fell in love is still inside you. Us having grown will only give us a new part of ourselves to explore. </p><p>You are dumb and stubborn and you never think things through but you would sooner give up your birthright than let your people and those you love be hurt. At some point you need to realize there is good and evil in everybody and a lot of people are more evil than good. It will not do you any good to trust that the people in power always have the best intentions. wether or not an action is justified you need to decide for yourself. You need to ask yourself the question; for what possible reason could decimating the southern water tribe be beneficial to the fire nation and its citizens. Since the capture of the last water bender under Azulon reign what resources have we brought to them? what have we taken from them? and how many of our people died for the Firelord to have control over that block of ice that is a nation? I cannot simply tell you the answers for then you will never truly understand. When it comes to what is right or wrong; honourable or dishonourable, that should be decided through your own judgments and opinions. Don't let other people tell you how to feel.</p><p>yours,</p><p>Mai</p><p>____________________________________________________________________</p><p>Once I set the letter out to dry I compose myself and head down to Piandao's study. I knock on his door and am greeted by Fat;</p><p>"Hello Fat, may I speak with Piandao."</p><p>"Of course Lady Mai, I will leave you two too your discussions"</p><p>"Very well, come in Mai" Piandao said with a waving hand motion</p><p>I sit in the chair in front of his desk and begin to speak</p><p>"I hav-</p><p>"You should-</p><p>we both say at the same time.</p><p>"You go first Mai."</p><p>"Thank you, I have decided to go back to the capital city to my family."</p><p>"I guess we both had the same idea then" he said with a slight chuckle</p><p>"When should you be leaving?" he continues</p><p>"The day after the yuan archer leaves, I'd like to practice a bit more before I leave and I'm in no rush."</p><p>"Good, and based on your more relaxed nature I assume the letter you received held good news"</p><p>I didn't even realize I was relaxing in the chair, I need to drill myself on propriety before I leave as well.</p><p>"News good enough" I say remembering his letters of doubt.</p><p>"We must try to be happy with what we have"</p><p>"Only if what we have can make us happy" I retort</p><p>"I'll miss your wit but it's all for the best, I'll have a gift ready for you by your parting day, I'll even invite some of my old students in the area and we'll have one last party before you head back to a life of dull sophistication"</p><p>"That would be much appreciated Piandao, I'm sure I'll have a fun time beating everyone of them again if only to prove that I have been your best student" I say with an air of joking sarcasm which he chuckles too.</p><p>Once the joking mood has died down the room start to feel serious.</p><p>"Stay safe,"</p><p>"I will"</p><p>"write to me,"</p><p>"I will"</p><p>"and be strong."</p><p>"I already am"</p><p>"I know you are"</p><p>"Thank you Master Piandao" I say in a whisper. </p><p>"It was my pleasure to see such an amazing girl realize her potential"</p><p>"I still have a long ways to go"</p><p>"I don't doubt it, but I don't doubt that if you really tried to you could even beat me"</p><p>"That has to be the greatest compliment I've ever received, I didn't think you'd ever be willing to admit it"</p><p>"More than that, on the day of the party before everybody, my students, your peers, and other masters alike; we will fight, and you will win."</p>
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